Apr 27, 2011

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Young ds106 webhopper…

If you are reading this, you have stumbled into a world where you will create things each week. Instead of reading boring chapters in a textbook that you will only get $5.00 for if you sell it back to those creepy guys who give you “ca$h for book$,” you will read the magnificent posts created by your fellow ds106 webhoppers. You will make art for homework and you will never have to waste paper and ink EVER AGAIN. (If you don’t want to.) Instead of writing boring, long journal or response papers about books you don’t really care about because you thought that from the title of the class it would be fun and it isn’t really anymore (too much work for your buck$), you will comment on your friend’s blogs.

And you will make friends. Because there are people who do have the same interests as you do. (Unless your interests are really weird, but I am sure you will have something in common with some of your classmates and people who stumble upon your blog.) You will answer to a man called “Reverend” or “Jim Groom” and will be slightly terrified by his weekly emails that will begin to show up in your email inbox. For they will tell you that by the end of the week, you will have accomplished such things as that you will have a domain and it will be connected to some sort of hosting site and you will have to install this foreign thing called “WordPress” by the end of the week.

BUT STAY CALM MY YOUNG ds106 WEBHOPPER! All will be well. You will get your assignments done and you will make things–great fantastic things you will tell your mama about and try to explain to your grandparents about when they call you on the phone every Sunday night and ask you about how your homework is going–such as a video commentary in iMovie that you would have never thought possible or writing, recording, and making a 30 minute radio show (now, since it’s in the future, you’re probably doing it on ds106TV in most likely 3D!!!). You will gain many skills that you can (ab)use for fun and tell your future employers that you know how to use them now. You will show your work to your friends who are not in the class and they will be overcome by jealousy and the fact that they and their work are not known by Jim Groom.

And it is true that in times of great struggle with assignments or if Audacity decides to fail on you and erase your whole project that, yes, you may curse the name of Jim Groom once, or twice, or 3.333339 million times. But don’t worry, my child, it is okay. It is all part of the process. He will ask you to fight back eventually and you must use your creative power to defeat all the obstacles projects he challenges with you each week. He really only wants you to succeed.

In the end, if you stick it out and try a little, you will go on a wonderous journey to the ends of the internet and you will make great art. When you have finished this class, I ask that you return to this post and leave a comment of your own. For if you succeed and remember to come back, when all is said and done that there is only one more thing I can say to you…

My child, you are no longer a “webhopper,” but have fully achieved the title of “web wanderer.”

Now, go forth and conquer the internet.

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